fear

6 authentic tips to conquer fear in your life.

fearHave you ever won­dered why some peo­ple wake up enthu­si­as­tic about their day? while some peo­ple look like the next sea­son of the walk­ing dead about to hap­pen? How do some peo­ple pur­sue their goals with such unre­lent­ing pas­sion and vig­or? you can just see the ener­gy that they have for what they do.The rea­son this is pos­si­ble is because they have over­come fear in their lives. They have tran­scend­ed them.

Today I’m going to talk about 6 tips to help you to over­come your fears. these are the fears that every human has in one form or the oth­er.

First of all what are fears and why do we get them? Fear is a defense mech­a­nism. it’s your body’s alarm sys­tem to let you know that it sens­es dan­ger or unknown vari­ables. We are often afraid of the unknown and uncer­tain­ty. In fact the two great­est fears are said to be the fear of pover­ty and the fear of death accord­ing to the book: Out­wit­ting the dev­il by Napoleon Hill.

You can check out the audio-book on YouTube by click­ing on the link above. It’s a great read, is engag­ing and some­times chill­ing. Keep an open mind when read­ing though it may seem a lit­tle trip­py but it offers sound advice for any­one who is inter­est­ed in read­ing and who is a sound thinker.

The book is the basis of this post because it out­lines 6 basic fears that almost every human has.

These fears are:

  • Pover­ty
  • Crit­i­cism
  • Ill­ness
  • Old age
  • Loss of love
  • Death

 

These are all nat­ur­al fears which we need to over­come in order to live our dreams.

Fear of poverty

bankrupt, bankruptcy, broken piggy bank, cash, coins, financial problem, no money icon

Do you remem­ber that para­ble in the Bible about the 3 men who were giv­en tal­ents (or gold) by their mas­ter. Each got a dif­fer­ent amount of tal­ents. While two of the men mul­ti­plied their earn­ings one of them buried his because he feared los­ing it. 

When the mas­ter came back he request­ed that each man show him their tal­ents. While he was impressed with the first two that they had mul­ti­plied theirs, he was dis­ap­point­ed in the man who hid his. He then took the man’s tal­ent and gave it to the man with the most.

The moral of the sto­ry is this: being afraid of los­ing some­thing often ends with the exact fear you were try­ing to avoid being real­ized. Instead of using the tal­ent to earn more tal­ents, the man held on to it. This is the same way our mind­set works when we have a fear of pover­ty. We hold on to our mon­ey which is depre­ci­at­ing in val­ue. Instead of allow­ing our mon­ey to work for us. 

how this fear affects your finances

This is the dif­fer­ence between sav­ing and invest­ing. Sav­ing is the safe men­tal­i­ty but you get less return. It is the hoard­ing men­tal­i­ty. Of course I would be a fool not to say you should not save but sav­ing alone won’t help you to grow as fast as invest­ing.

Invest­ing is the risk or as I like to call it the faith men­tal­i­ty. You might have greater loss with invest­ing but you will also have greater returns.You can see how this fear stops you from grow­ing in your life.

Tip: If you fear pover­ty invest more. Do the oppo­site of the nat­ur­al reac­tion to fear­ing it. The nat­ur­al reac­tion would be to hoard and be stingy with your mon­ey, you have to go against this feel­ing. give more. when you give, more actu­al­ly comes back to you.

Fear of criticism

chat, comment, communication, message, talk, wechat icon

A lot of peo­ple live their lives afraid of what peo­ple who have absolute­ly no influ­ence on their life might say of them. In the words of the moti­va­tion­al speak­er Les Brown “they don’t pay your bills” what makes them an author­i­ty in your life?

The rea­son we are afraid of crit­i­cism is the nat­ur­al need for us to appear as one of the crowd. when we are young most of us focus on fit­ting in instead of stand­ing out.according to tinybuddha.com, we all judge and crit­i­cize peo­ple. In fact we do this ever day. we have a ten­den­cy to cri­tique every­thing we come across, you’re prob­a­bly cri­tiquing this blog post right now.

Every body gets crit­i­cized no mat­ter how big, pop­u­lar great you think peo­ple are.  There are always haters. Use crit­i­cism to grow your­self, some peo­ple do offer con­struc­tive crit­i­cism but there are oth­ers that are just focused on tear­ing you down. Crit­i­cism is a major fear for a lot of peo­ple and it can dic­tate the course of your entire life.

How criticism affects your life

Say you had a fam­i­ly that had a tra­di­tion of work­ing every day of their lives and rely­ing on a pen­sion (those days are going  fast)  and you decid­ed to break the mold and start a busi­ness. You would get crit­i­cized it’s nat­ur­al for you to have that fear because you are step­ping out­side your com­fort zone. What you should do is to find oth­er peo­ple who have done what you are try­ing to do and who faced crit­i­cism them­selves and who over­came the crit­i­cism and became bet­ter.

The irony of the sit­u­a­tion is that many times the peo­ple who orig­i­nal­ly crit­i­cized you when you were start­ing out will want to learn from you when they see you mak­ing progress in your life. The thing is they were afraid to do what you did so they crit­i­cized you for it. This attracts more fear and before you know  it they start cre­at­ing rea­sons for not doing some­thing that is usu­al­ly an excuse.

Tip: If you have a fear of being crit­i­cized. Find oth­er peo­ple who were in sim­i­lar sit­u­a­tions and per­se­vered. Also devel­op your self con­fi­dence to not care about what peo­ple say;they are often the first to con­grat­u­late you on your achieve­ments. They may also be the first to ask you how you achieved your goal. Humans are visu­al so keep work­ing. keep striv­ing and let your results speak for them­selves.

Fear of Ill Health

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Many peo­ple are afraid of get­ting some form of dis­ease or ail­ment. As a result they are super para­noid about  cer­tain coun­tries and they just fear get­ting sick. Usu­al­ly the fear is unfound­ed and what is worst we don’t know what dis­eases we may have inher­it­ed. So don’t wor­ry about what you have no con­trol over.

Being afraid of ill­ness is nat­ur­al. it is apart of our sur­vival mech­a­nism. in the far past ill­ness usu­al­ly meant death as there weren’t any effec­tive med­ical reme­dies for cer­tain ill­ness­es. over time we grew to fear becom­ing sick. Also with sick­ness comes pain and suf­fer­ing and no one wants to feel these things.

Tip: If you fear get­ting sick don’t be para­noid. Ensure that you are get­ting enough vit­a­mins and min­er­als in your body. This will strength­en your immune sys­tem. take care of your body and it will take care of you.

Fear of Old Age

avatar, grandfather, male, man, mature, old, person icon

Old age is inevitable. We all age and if we are lucky wis­dom comes with age. It is baf­fling how peo­ple are afraid of aging when it is a nat­ur­al pro­gres­sion of life. look at the bright side of things the old­er peo­ple in the world own most of the wealth of the world. They tend to be more con­tent with their lives (add research)

Tip: If you fear get­ting old look at the pos­i­tives and not the neg­a­tives. Age is a nat­ur­al pro­gres­sion of life, it shows that you are alive. Also you acquire wis­dom with age and have a bet­ter appre­ci­a­tion of life.

Fear of Loss of love

affection, heart, love, passion icon

Have you ever found that spe­cial some­one that you thought was the one. Do you fear them leav­ing you? why do you feel this way?. We all have a need to feel love and want­ed. it makes us feel spe­cial. it shows us that we mat­ter. fear dis­torts this love how­ev­er.

Do you know some­one who is unnat­u­ral­ly clingy with their sig­nif­i­cant oth­er. what usu­al­ly hap­pens? yes they usu­al­ly get dumped. they fear los­ing their loved one so bad­ly that they stick to them like glue. once again the fear of the loss of love actu­al­ly caus­es the loss of love.

Tip: If you find your­self becom­ing too clingy to your loved one give them a lit­tle room to breathe. you are not Siamese twins you are part­ners and some­times peo­ple need their alone time. if they tru­ly love you they will miss you and will come run­ning to back to you.

Fear of Death

death icon

This is a big one. every­body fears death. How­ev­er we have no con­trol over when we will die. What we can do is take care of our bod­ies the best we can and exer­cise cau­tion in our every­day lives. the fear of death may leave many peo­ple so para­noid they become seclud­ed and cut them­selves off from the world. This is no way to live. Death is a nat­ur­al part of life. We were born there­fore we are going to die. Sounds mor­bid but it is nec­es­sary to come to terms with the fact that we have no con­trol over death there­fore there is no need to wor­ry. live your life to the fullest.

Tip: to over­come the fear of death ask your­self why are you afraid to die? sounds sil­ly I know but ask it. Is it some­thing you feel you have to accom­plish before you die? or is it a loved one you don’t want to leave behind. Are you proud of the life you are liv­ing? come to terms with the fact that death is nat­ur­al and wor­ry­ing about it won’t solve the issue.

Conclusion

these six fears can have crip­pling effects on our lives. which ones affect you the most? Iden­ti­fy them as they can sti­fle your suc­cess. Share this post if you learnt some­thing valu­able,  com­ment if you have any­thing to add and sub­scribe to my blog for more awe­some con­tent. Here’s to a world with­out fears. enjoy your week.

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